coughcoughcough

As expected, my cold turned into a full-blown illness.  I don't get sick very often, but when I do it really kicks my ass.  I'm pretty sure I have bronchitis now, so I'm going to go to the doctor tomorrow and see what he can do about it.  Although I sound like death, I am actually feeling better than I was earlier this week.  I was out of work and class this past Tuesday and Wednesday, and today is really the first day I've felt well enough to get up, move around, and accomplish things.

As far as eating goes, I haven't been doing very much of it this past week, which is probably why I lost 1.5 pounds and currently weigh 211.  Although I expect an upswing in my appetite as I start to feel better, I am concentrating on a preemptive strike, if you will.  Although I did not journal my food servings last week because I was sick, I would like to give that another shot this week.  I went grocery shopping today, and did not let myself buy anything I knew I would eat excessive amounts of (like ice cream).  Although the reason for my weight loss this week wasn't hard work, that doesn't make the changes I'm already feeling in my body any less motivating.  I can already feel my hips thinning again and I've been imagining what I'll look like after I lose even five more pounds.  Although losing weight is a priority for me, I feel like it's wrapped up in a complicated emotional web that I need to untangle.  I've been thinking about seeing a psychologist (students get two free visits a year at our campus health center) for some lingering issues, and I think my mental health should really be the top priority here.  And I find that if I incorporate health changes slowly, they're easier to stick to.  I'm not making plans or schedules or timetables for my weight loss anymore.  I want to let it happen naturally while I'm enjoying my life, and because embarking on a healthier lifestyle will improve my life, my efforts to be healthier are really making me happy now instead of dragging me down with worry and self-doubt about whether or not I'll ever lose X amount of pounds. 

All that being said, I'm planning on going to Zumba again tomorrow night.  I'm also hoping that another girl in my dance class and I can do a duet at this fall's recital (sorry if I mentioned that before...), so in addition to my normal dance classes I will probably be doing extra practices.  I would love to bring yoga back into my life again, and I think I might try doing twenty minutes of yoga on the mornings I don't have to work this week. 

Of course, this all depends on whether or not my cough starts going away and I really get to feeling better again, but I'm optimistic.  And if it doesn't happen this week, that's okay - as long as I gave it some amount of effort, I know it's okay to let my goals slide to next week.  It's a life change, not a race.  I always hated races anyway.